Teens face real problems in their everyday lives. During this time, they are exposed to overwhelming struggles. I guess I can say I made it out of my teenage years successfully, not trying to brag, but I’m in the position to motivate you on how to deal with the problems you are facing. Trust me it’s nothing you can’t get through! Everyone including our parents have passed through “teenage crisis” Let’s get started, the first and the most obvious step in life is to live, so who decides how you live? To me truly the answer is YOU. During my teenage years I told myself “Do not fall victim to human emotions” such as sorrow, pleasure, pain and so on. I often visualized the future, you know? The bigger picture ahead. As a teenager you go through awkward growth spurts and gain various experiences from reading novels, social media, breaking and building relationships. “The brain continues to change throughout life, but there are huge leaps in development during adolescence” said Sarah Johnson, professor at Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School. Adolescence is considered a time of critical development between ages 11 and 19. Most times teenagers go through difficulties that are not worth it in the end. In life, the choices you make depends solely on you and nobody else.
First and foremost, Parental Guidance, Teenagers need parental guidance. I mean who else is going to take care of you and direct you? The basic needs in life include shelter, food, and clothing, things your parents provide for you without you having to ask. Dads work so much and moms sacrifice almost everything for you. I use to think my mom didn’t like me having any fun! I didn’t understand why I had to be back home by 5pm while my friends could be out till 10pm. I felt like the black sheep among all my buddies. I’ll stop and tell you right now, always follow the rules and guidelines your parents set for you. Trust me in the end its all for your own good. As you get older, you begin to see your parents as real people and why they did the things they did (“Oh, wow, dad worked so late to keep up with my wants and sponsor school trips.”) Do not distance yourself from either of them, they want you closer to them than ever. Speak up on how you feel on certain topics they discuss with you. I’m not saying you should be an open book but personal talks with them help. Honestly, you will like them the second you move out, most teens don’t believe it until they go through it. To avoid feeling like a total jerk in the future for all the hell you put them through, go make up the rest of the time you have with them starting NOW!
Do you have a best friend? The one you call “wifey”, “twin”, or “husband” and spend literally every hour with? Be careful with how much you share with that person, try not to trust them blindly because the bitter truth is they may not be your best friend in a few years. You might get into a big argument and never speak to each other again or worse if you have deeper feelings for one another and slowly start to drift away. At first it may make you cry but you will laugh about it in the next five years. Don’t misunderstand me, you may just find that one friend who completely understands and accepts you and that’s awesome! I’m only warning you of the race before you reach the finish line. Trust me when your emotions get tampered with it feels like a needle being pricked on your skin over and over again. If you are the extremely sensitive type my advice to you would be cherish the moment’s you have now and don’t get distracted with trying to fit in, looking for acceptance from others, all that gets you riled up and confused. Oh! And of course, peer pressure, avoid it. Surround yourself with people you like, and like doing things together. (Things that won’t get you in a large amount of trouble.) If it’s a little more complicated, take a chance and join a peer group. Peer groups encourage you to try new things, and hang out with others who easily understand you.
Hormones, hormones and more hormones! Teenage hormones are the chemicals that cause the physical growth and sexual development from your teens into adulthood. You’ll notice that your emotions, moods and sexual feelings are much stronger. Teenage hormones are mixtures of vulnerability and potential. Automatically everything you do has a high feeling of intensity about it. Your first kiss, first time you fell in love, the first time you drove a car will still be remembered 10-20 years from now. At times you may also feel more impulsive and more inclined to take risks, like experimenting with drugs or alcohol, driving without a license or having unsafe sex. It was hard for me to understand all the changes my body and mind was going through, I thought they were weird, a little freaky and unnatural. But I was so wrong, developing hormones are pretty much normal for everyone. We’ve all been there! Dating isn’t just about building social skills or finding a romantic partner; it’s an opportunity to learn about your personal values, needs, and desires. Spending time with others is a way to identify what you like and don’t like in other people and in yourself. If you aren’t ready, that’s fine too. Always go at your own pace. In addition, don’t let rejection tear you down, I know sometimes mood swings get the best of you but it can be used to your own advantage. Learn how to accept rejection without taking it personally. Once you master that skill it will help you throughout your life. Never rush into intimacy, don’t bother about what your friends are doing. You are who you are never be ashamed of what you stand for and believe in. Honest and comfortable discussions on sexuality with your parents can help ease your nerves and also clarify any possible questions that you have.
Discovering who you are is one of the biggest challenges as a teenager. (I know that was a tough one for me.) It’s possible your identity may change from one month to the next. You have the opportunity to experiment with your personal values, style, beliefs, and sexuality. All you need to have is healthy self-esteem and a strong support system, you can build your new identity with confidence. You don’t need anyone’s acceptance and the moment they make you feel like you do, walk away. It may be difficult at first but if I can do it, then so can you!
BY: Aishat. B