A LIFE FULL OF REGRET

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My name is Cassandra, I hail from Imo state. I happen to come from a very poor family but due to my intelligence and coupled with the fact that I am the only surviving child of my parents, they were very determined to send me through school despite their limited resources. Education of a girl child is almost a taboo in the village where I come from. One day my father said “Cassandra my daughter, what would you like to do when you grow up?’’ I didn’t hide my passion for banking jobs at all as I told him that I would want to be a banker and possibly become the first female governor of the CBN.

Luckily, I gained admission into the University of Benin to study Banking and Finance, bringing me closer to the actualization of my dream. Throughout my 100 level, I was very studious and hardworking, spending most of my free time in the school library. I was very stunned to see that most people around me didn’t bother to put so much effort into their school work and I wondered how they would succeed in life with such nonchalant attitude. Surprisingly, the ones I viewed as unserious were the ‘big boys’ and ‘girls’ on campus. They had their own cars and were the best dressed on campus. At a time, I started to envy them and this eventually took me to the other side of school life. I became close to a girl named Ola in my department. She rarely ever attended lectures but was very rich. On a fateful day, we both exchanged numbers and soon became best of friends. Interestingly, I found out that she was not from a rich home but she got her money by going out with older men that she called ‘sugar daddies’. Soon she introduced me to some of these rich old men who were mostly politicians and powerful business men.

Suddenly, my financial status changed and I moved from the school hostel to a two bedroom flat in Benin town. My love for academic work dropped because I was made to believe that the essence of school is to make money, which I already had. I lost sight of what was ahead and forgot my ambition and this affected my semester results negatively and my GP dropped to less than 2.0 but I cared less. Often, I travelled to Abuja and at other times, I went outside the country with my ‘sugar daddies’. I dressed expensively and even bought things I didn’t need. My parent became worried but trust students; I told them intelligent lies to cover it up. One of my numerous ‘sugar daddies’ even bought me a brand new KIA product, one of the latest cars at that time. The reality dawned on me when one of them who promised to marry me irrespective of my result, told me that our contract had come to an end.  

Expectedly, I graduated with PASS (let my people go) and I found myself working as a clerk in my uncle’s firm because my result could not afford me a good white collar job. I saw my dream and ambition crash in front of me. I became ashamed of myself as I sold my car and travelled to Abuja where I met a young man who owned a small boutique. Now, am married but still live a life full of regret, for not facing my studies. I wish I could turn back the hands of time, then I would have studied very hard and made a good result but it is impossible. I decided to tell this story so that many young girls out there may learn from my mistakes. I am most grateful to God that He spared me and didn’t allow me to contact any deadly disease such as HIV/AIDS.