The quest for discipline is a never ending task for societal growth. This is one of the reasons why parents are so bent and concerned about getting their children to be disciplined. This is not done but through the act of getting the children to listen. The deal therefore is positive discipline which is an idea that centres on reverting things back to the root – when children do something wrong, instead of them being punished, parents teach and guide them to set the behavior right.
Discipline is regarded as any action or activities that is in agreement with what society termed as right. Most parents are concerned about the behavior of their children, hoping, planning and working to make sure their children are positively disciplined. Even though accepting behaviors differs from one place to another, the host community always have what they see as wrong or right.Â
Positive discipline on the hand is a kind of parenting style where children are accepted with both their good and bad behaviors. What is most important is the process of getting the children focused on doing the right thing. Parents concerned with positive discipline are actively involved in helping the children recognize ill behaviours and helping them correct their behaviours without hurting the children physically or verbally. This is in contrast to parents being punitive, angry, violent and destructive in attempt to correct behaviours and instill discipline.In instilling positive discipline, it is important to develop a sense of connection to the children. Children must be allowed a connection and a sense of belonging in a way that parents open up their arms and embrace their children for who they are and then open a chapter of making them grow to develop behaviours that the parents value. Children with poor academic performance, lack of respect for authorities and elders, drug abuse and other in disciplinary characteristics are to be hold in high esteem just as other children who display recognizable good behaviours.
Parents are also expected to teach the children important social and life skills such as respect for others, focus on academics, relationship with others, as well as the need to boost self-esteem.Â
Parents are also expected to prevent negative behaviours by teaching the children what is wrong from right. This would go a long way in helping the children have positive discipline. Some children might not be conversant with wanted or unwanted behaviours especially in a new environment. Since it is within the realm of parenting, it becomes imperative for parents to help children in being able to identify and differentiate what the society sees as wrong or right. Children need to know and understand what negative behaviours are before they end of doing one by accident. Furthermore, parents can go as far as being explicit about the consequences of one behaviour or the other. This would also go a long way in strengthening positive discipline. Â
One other problem is that of children listening to parents as getting a reluctant child to listen to his parents can be a real trial for parents. At a point, children are to listen and learn from their parents even when they are at the point of expressing themselves and doing what they want to do, which also conflicts with what the parents want the children to do. At this point it is important for parents to recognize the need to encourage listening by rewarding listening activities like reinforcing good behaviors, allow them to respectfully communicate back to parents and parents should be calm in giving directive or orders.Â
Finally, children are special and whatever happens to them, is of considerable concern to the parent. This is why it is important for parents to consider positive discipline as a key for child upbringing.
Maryam Islam.